Memories of Interrupted Christmas's

I will post about a couple Christmas's past here. I don't remember the exact dates of these, but I think that they were around 2000.

Before I realized that I never had to see MIL-JB and her almost as evil FIL-EJ again, tradition was that I we went to the ILs for Christmas Eve, left and spent the night at my Mom's, spent Christmas morning at my sister's then came home after lunch to have our Christmas together at home.

OK so one year, we got home and after we got home, we got a freezing rain. The phone rang in the middle of the night. It was FIL-EJ saying that MIL-JB was puking and could not stop so he was calling an ambulance. OK, so an adult is puking on Christmas night. This is a 300+ pound adult woman who thinks that you diet by eating vegetables, so she slices vegtables and deep fries them. So hubbie gets up and takes the three hour drive to meet them at the ER. Then goes to clean up the puke from the bathroom and bedroom before they come home, then he stayed there a few more days. In the Nasty House posting, I detail how unsanitary the place was, so it is possible that it was food poisoning, which I feel is probably what eventually killed both of them. But part of me says that they were PO'd that hubbie was at home with me and not with them at the holidays.

The following year was even more strange. It was a couple days after Christmas -- between Christmas and New Years. Hubbie was out hiking (not me, I'm not a hiker, so I was hanging around home). He got a cell phone call from his Mother. She said that Evil FIL EJ was throwing up and wouldn't go to the hospital. His sister was out of town and EJ did not know how to get in touch with her. So hubbie cuts his hike short and the two of us drive the three hours down there. FIL seems OK by the time we get there, but hubbie want him to go get checked out. Evil JB kept saying how she did not know how to get in touch with sister-in-law who happened to be spending her Christmas time with her husband's family. So I ask what the name of the person who she is staying with is. She tells me. So I get my cell phone out and call my Dad to look up the phone number on the Internet. Suddenly, Evil JB realizes that her (adult) grandson in town probably knows the number because he always knows where his mother is. Of course, the daughter in law cannot get the credit for finding the number, can she. So she calls her grandson and gets the number and calls sister in law. Somehow, I do not find any of this to be conincidence -- that she calls her son into town saying that FIL is sick on the exact day that her daughter is out of town with her husband's family. The fact that she cannot get in touch with her daughter until I almost get her in touch with her, some 7 or 8 hours after she initially called her son to town.

And there have been other incidents, too. These were two years in a row and stick out the most.

A Visit from JB's Brother In Law

Many years ago, one of JB's husband EJ's brothers was in out town. They were going on a plane trip somewhere early in the morning, so they were spending the night at an airport hotel. They called to tell them that they were going to be in town, so he said we'd go out and get dinner together somewhere. The entitled ones always call on hubbie for things.... I sort of thought they were hoping for the offer of a free bedroom. He didn't pick up on it, and I didn't volunteer the info.

They come over to go out. Hubbie at the time was doing service work and "on-call" 24/7. He got called A LOT and of course, as soon as they got there, his pager went off. He went and answered and it turned out that he had to go out on an out of town call. His aunt turned around and looked at me and said "S----, you don't have to take us out. You can just cook something for us here."

To his credit, before my chin could hit the floor, hubbie said that we had time to go to Taco Bell before he left.

Remember in one of my previous posts, I told about how his Mom's sister came to town and expected my hubbie to drop everything and spend a Saturday helping her find an apartment in the area. (He knew as little about apartments in the area as anybody else. All he knew was some of the major roads when they got directions.)

The whole family were a bunch of entitled leeches.

The Time JB Gave Me the Finger

I was once visiting JB and her hubbie EJ with with my hubbie. This would have to be before 2002 as I quit seeing them in 2002. I said something that she didn't like. I do not remember what it was, but it was not something that I expected to be taken in any bad kind of way.

She turned around and gave me the finger!

Sad thing is.... that is not out of character for something she would do. I had seen her do this to others -- esp her hubbie EJ (but I never saw her do it to my hubbie, her beloved son.)

I posted this to the support group and the following are some responses that I got:

• What a classy lady your MIL always sounds..............
  
  
• If my mil did that,i would have whipped out my cell fone and taken a photo or vid and shown it to my dh.Or i would have given her the finger back.But knowing me i would have commented about how low class she is for giving someone the finger for no reason and walked away.
  
  
• NM has done this to me. Usually when drunk but also when sober when she was in a particularly jealous and vindictive mood.
  
  
• Well that was mature.
  
  
• klassy.
  
  
• She's a lady, alright.
  
  
• Lovely woman.

JB's Sisters -- They did it on purpose

This one is about JB's sisters. This is a strange story that just re-occurred to me.

MIL's sister#1 had gotten a temporary job in an adjoining city to us. She had asked hubbie to help her find an apartment to stay in while here. She was coming to town on a particular day. Hubbie never heard anything else from her -- confirmation, when/where, etc until midmorning that Saturday, so he did not set his whole day aside for them. So mid-morning that Saturday, hubbie and I were on the counter-service restaurant to meet a friend for brunch.

While we were on the way there, MIL's sister #2 called hubbie's cell. He invited his dufus Aunts to meet us at the restaurant. We had already ordered and paid when they arrived, so he was at least off the hook for having to buy for them. (Everyone in his family, not just JB and her evil hubbie considered my hubbie to be rich and expected him to pay for things.)

Not long after they got there, one of the sisters poured her coffee into my lap. It soaked my clothes, but fortunately did not burn me. (Very fortunate as I usually ice to the coffee at this place to make it drinkable.) So I had to go home to get out of the wet clothes. Wearing soaked blue jeans is not fun.

This happened many years ago and I now realize that this was probably done on purpose to get rid of me -- to get my hubbie to themselves.

So I drove home and DH rode with them to look at apartments. (I took DH's car, so he had to ride with him. I was not about to get the friend to take me home -- she's a dangerous driver, but that's not really related to this story.)



Then later, they all came back to our house. When they got here, the two sisters started going all over the ground floor or the house, looking and peeking into every room. Just like MIL and SIL used to do. This was bad enough, then Sister #2 (not the one looking for an apartment) looked into the spare bedroom and said "This is where I stayed when I was here."
I DO NOT RECALL HER EVER EVEN BEING AT MY HOUSE BEFORE, MUCH LESS SPENDING THE NIGHT. So if she had been, I was out of town. This is not the kind of thing that I would forget. I quizzed DH about it. He claimed to now know what she was talking about.

DH would not have lied about it to cover his tracks. Even if I had gotten mad about it, he would not have gotten defensive about being able to have whoever over he wants, but it did not get to that point. So either she was lying or he does not remember. HE's kind of goofy and does forget things like that sometime. I'll often say "remember when...." and he does not. Yes, I worry that it could be a problem, but that's another thing as well.

Still, it's creepy that JB's sister claims to have spent the night in my house and neither me nor hubbie remembers anything about it. There is no way she would have gotten access without us knowing. If JB ever had a key, I did not know it and there was no evidence. I don't think JB did. Hubbie is funny about keys, no matter how well he knows somebody. He might forget something having someone over but I COULD NOT IF I WANTED TO.

Just her claim wierds me out. Even more than having JB in my house since the aunt is almost a total stranger to me.

I now know she spilled the coffee to get rid of me. But why did she claim that she slept in my house? That was just strange.

"Star Cookies"

It was Christmas time and I had boxed up some homemade rolled Christmas sugar cookies for my sister's kids. For some reason, hubbie brought a couple into the house and gave them to the ILs.

The ones that he brought in happened to have been cut out as stars.

JB was going to a party and she had to bring something to. She said "DIL, make some of those 'star cookies' for me to bring."

No, I didn't have recipe with me, they were too much trouble, I don't cook in other people's kitchens, the dough needs to refrigerate.... Any other reasons in addition to the one in my head, "We don't like each other so why should I do that for you?"

Funny how something like that is fun to make for the right audience, but a chore for the wrong one.

I don't know that I could have done it if I had wanted to... but since I didn't want to, the rest did not matter.

The Fish Pond

In the yard there was a "fish pond".

It was an old bath tub filled with water and gold fish. Not an OLD antique bathtub, that would have been bad enough. But just an old used tub that had been removed from a 1960's era house.

Redneck, huh?

And, Why Did She Call This Time?

Often the posts on the support board lead me to remember things that I have forgotten. One was the text message game.

I remember something about my JB and text messages on her cell phone. Something about she was getting ones that weren't nice, but Hubbie's sister BG had to get them off for her. I asked Hubie, "Well, what was in the messages?" He said that BG only said "you wouldn't want to know."

It was quite a while back and I don't remember now why he told me the messages. He didn't usually tell me anything. I think he was trying to find out if I knew the number that they were coming from, but it was a number in MIL's city and I don't even know anybody in that area. (Yes, I know anyone can get a cell phone in any area, but nobody I knew did that either.) He had tried to trace the online number but I don't know that he found who it belonged to, only what city it belonged in.


After reading this you probably think what I think. MIL gets SIL to read her text messages for her, claiming she can't do it. Hubbie who lives in a different city from either receiver or alleged sender's number gets involved. Messages are supposedly not very nice. Uhhh huhhhhh....

It seemsed like an attention getting ploy to me. It seems staged to me. Why else would she get my hubbie involved? This is so teenage-- just like her other phone games.

Another Phone Game I Remembered

One evening, hubbie and I were working in the garden. While out there, she called his cell phone wanting to know what I wanted, claiming I had just called her and gotten disconnected. I guess I had been going in or out of the house, but we were both in the yard when she called.

But now, I as I think back... (Often everything didn't occur to me at the time it happened) If she really thought I had called, why did she return the call to his cell phone? Isn't it more like she wanted attention from him and couldn't think of anything, huh?

So 15 years old!

JB/EJ's Sense of Entitlement

In one of my early posts and in my header, I wrote of MIL JB and FIL EJ believing that they were entitled to a portion of what their son has. The words "our son" and "have" are words I often heard.

This story is about just how far they felt entitlement -- it went beyond my own hubbie.

Their youngest granddaughter took a job at KFC after she dropped out of high school and got pregnant. She got a bonus award at work for pleasing the secret shopper. I don't remember the amount, but it was at most $100. This was before EJ died since I was there to hear the story and he died after I quit going there. When MIL told us about it she ended it with "You had better believe that she is going to keep that all for herself. Nobody else will see a dime of it." My thoughts -- why would anybody think anything different. It's her money isn't it? She has a baby to take care of doesn't she?

Thing 1 and Thing 2

In my other blog, I talked a little about strange gifts from EJ, my not-so-dearly departed father in law. He thought it was amazing that you could get figurines for only a dollar at the dollar store. So he bought those to give as gifts. Not just one per person, but many many of them. He knew lots of people. For Christmas gifts, he would take blocks of wood, paint them, then glue the cheap figurines onto them. He spent hundreds of dollars doing this, due to sheer quantity. He knew lots of people. He thought somehow that people treasured these creations. I don't even see that you could classify them as redneck. They didn't really make scenes. They were just however many figurines he could glue onto the piece of wood he had.

When he died, there were already a bunch ready for the following Christmas. His family was saying how he already had his Christmas presents ready, that 'he knew he was going to die.' I don't really think so. Because this was not the first time he had done this. He did this every year.

I threw mine in the garbage. But to hubbie, anything, no matter what it was, that passed from his parents hands to his hands was instant treasure, and instant heirloom, so he kept hold of his. I took pictures of a couple of them. I don't know what to call them other than 'thing 1' and 'thing 2'.


Thing 1:



Thing 2:

More About the House

I wrote a new description of the house itself for the bulletin board I go to. This one is not (so much) its condition that included some things not in the previous house postings, so I thought I'd add that here.

JB and her hubbie EJ built it themselves, they weren't builders or contractors. He had help from his Brothers/BIL's/friends who had worked in electricity, plumbing, or whatever.
It has a stupid layout (which has been made more stupid over the years), shag carpet (originally orange, now orange with dirt holding it together), filing cabinets used as furniture and lots of clutter. Also, a bunch of gray metal shelves with useless junk piled on them.

It's a square house. The only room on the ground floor that you can tell what it's for is the kitchen -- sort of -- that would be the room with the sink, stove, refrigerator, washer, dryer, and shower stall, right? The "kitchen" has a shower stall with a moldy curtain in it! There is a working toilet under the stairs (right off the kitchen) but you could hardly get in there for the clutter. All four rooms have exterior exits. (The shower and toilet are what I refer to as stupid add-ons -- but I suppose that at some point you want more than one bath in a house and want one downstairs.) But every kitchen has a shower stall, doesn't it?

As for the stupid layout, with no original downstairs bath, it's not like it's because of age. It was built in the late 60's or early 70's -- from colors in the house, I'd guess the 70's and never upgraded. The house that they moved there from did NOT have an indoor bath, so maybe they did not think they needed more than one and upstairs they put it near where they slept or more likely, where they had room for it. Upstairs is also in quadrants -- three are bedrooms and the fourth is the former bathroom The sink and toilet have for some reason been removed. The tub along with it's glass shower doors is soldered in with mold. There are still pipes in there and part of a sink cabinet, but it's in a different place from where the sink actually was. Hubbie once tried to improve the bathroom. He removed the shower doors and threw them out because they were in such bad conditoin. He replaced it with a curtain rod and a new shower curtain. FIL retrieved the doors and superglued them back in. ( I would almost bet the old mold and soapscum were included int he glue-back-in. But, that's just a guess based on how I knew him, I don't state that they were replaced dirty as a fact.)

The ceilings are 7 feet high. The stairs are shorter than standard stairs then the top step is about a half-height of the rest of them. I never went up them enough times that I ever got up it without tripping on that! There is a bedroom that has orange walls and a yellow ceiling (or vice-versa).

The house was also not heated or air conditioned. It has strip heaters screwed to the moldings. They cut holes in the sides of the house and inserted window unit air conditoiners into them. But of course they cut the holes too big and stuffed the rest of the opening with insulation. They put the air condioners in the wall because they did not want to block the windows. Doesn't sound like such a bad idea, but I don't remember the curtains ever being opened!


The land is in a place that it would not be worth anything in a good economy. I think I described that before. It's between run down commercial property and a railroad track. It's also off the end of a runway, but it's a small town airport with only a couple small planes a day, so the runway isn't that big a deal. {Well, more than I thought, I just looked. It looks like about 15 airline arrivals and 15 departures a day all puddle jumpers. There are 2 airlines going in and out. More of a hopping place than I thought! Plus general aviation and some cargo flights. }


Hubbie says that if it had new windows, exterior siding and heating/ac added it would be a good house! How many times did I say that I am glad we did not inherit it?

Where did the Money Go?

Last Thursday, I was telling my boss about the condition of "the haunted house". He is into building, renovations, and such. As I described it to him, the thought occurred to me...

Just where did all of that money go? JB and EJ (JB's hubbie) called my hubbie whenever they wanted anything or perceived a need, and he usually complied. (Only one exception that I know about**)

He spent tens of thousands on their house. And the place is a dump (reference the posting on my other blog about the Haunted House.) With the exception of the purchase price, we have spent far less money on our house. And ours in a lot better condition. I can just imagine what a nice place our house would be if the money that had gone to JB and EJ's haunted house had been put into our house. We'd have those hardwoods, that redone family room..... things that I just think about but haven't spent the money on.... Our place would be parade of homes quality with all of the money spent on it that was sunk into the Haunted House -- the Haunted House isn't even good enough for a slum house.

*** The only exception was that she was that she wanted him to either install a stair life/elevator or build on a downstairs master suite. He didn't have the money for that without coming to me and he knew better.

How Dirty The House Was: Warning: Gross

It was beyond cluttered. yes, very cluttered. A dirty place is generally cluttered, isn't it. The room that you walked into was the one she used for the dining room. She had to scrape the piles of whatever off of the table to use it.

The whatever included papers, dirty dishes from the previous meal, dirty and/or clean laundry and whatever else happened to need to be dropped on the table.

Most meals were eaten off of this table. It had a ceiling fan over it. The fan and lights looked like they had never been cleaned. A thick layer of dust on the blades and she would run the fan while eating at the table. Of course, dust and cobwebs on the light fixture part of it as well.

In the kitchen, it was gross. There was so much stuff in there that I never saw the kitchen counter while she was alive. Stuff was stacked all the way from the counter to the bottom of the cabinet.

Like in many dirty places, everything had a yellow film of grease over it. Her garbage "can" was actually an open bag hanging on a metal frame (like you sometimes see used for leaf bags). It was not taken outside until full -- and it was a large bag. There were tiny little bugs flying all around it -- like maggots. And of course it smelled bad.

I will probably do a separate post later about food safety. But for now I'll say there was none. She would leave food out an uncovered for hours (recall she has bugst.). People would go by and pick pieces of the food with their hands.

There were roaches all over the house. You would expect that with all the open food and garbage container, wouldn't you? She actually had a fly swatter on her coffee table in the living room. She used that to swat the roaches that walked across the coffee table.

Dishes were only washed occasionally. She would not use the dishwasher that hubbie bought and installed for her because she did not want to hear the noise (after guilting him into getting and installing it). When she did wash dishes, she used cold water because hot water hurt her hands.

She had a chair where she perched herself. It was surrounded by stacks of magazines, containers of snack food, the remote control, etc. (It was a lift type chair. Heaven forbid she exert energy getting her fat a$$ up herself.)

There was something growing in the shower the last time I was there and was brave enough to look in. First time I was there too. That mold was probably the base for the later mold!

The place had its own unique smell.

Somehow reading this, my words do not sound as gross as the house really was.

One of my birthdays

I posted this on the MIL board. I said it was my 30^th birthday, but actually, I think it was my 35^th.

My hubbie did invite everyone he knew over to our house for my 30th birthday. As I am pushing 50 in a couple years, that's a long time ago.

Guess who was first to show up and last to leave?

JB brought with her: 8 yo niece, an Aunt and a friend who I never met. When hubbie got the cake out, the friend said "I didn't know it was FIL-less's birthday, I just thought we were coming to see JB's SON's House."

JB seated herself at the head of the dining room table and took over the dining room as her personal party place all day. She got the phone at the table and started making phone calls and inviting all of her friends and relatives in the area over to our house to see her. Then offering them food and cake when they came over.

Oh, and she was on a diet, so she could not eat the food that hubbie had gotten. He had to go back out to Wendy's and get the particular type of Wendy's salad she wanted. Didn't keep her from pigging out on cake!

My family came as well. It was my birthday, but I was huddled in a corner of the kitchen with my family, eating standing up, while JB was having her own impromptu craptacular in honor of herself in the dining room/party room.

And my Mother is all about appearances. She in her usual fashion kept telling me to be nice, to be a good hostess, etc. But none of the people at the "other party", JB's personal party even knew me or cared that I was there. JB had the place, her son provided the food and phone and she was having fun.

I don't remember her bringing me a gift. That's ok. She always brought cr@p anyway, so it would have been something that I had to get rid of! I got rid of everything she ever gave me, because I did not want her energy or the reminders.

Stories of Various ones of Hubbie's Birthdays

She used his birthday as an excuse to get his attention and get things from him.

This is a post that I made on the support board about some of his birthdays:

She was in the hospital once on his birthday. Do we think it's a coincidence?

One year, I invited SIL for a visit so that DH and SIL could have some brother-sister bonding time. It turned in to a visit from the whole clan -- MIL, FIL, SIL, SIL's DH, SIL's three kids. I silently figured out where I would sleep everyone and bought food for eight people. Then MIL and two nieces showed -- I had cooked a dinner for ten and only had three of the expected six guests show up -- the ones missing were the ADULTS and an almost grown boy. I was so furious that I fed them leftovers the rest of the weekend and froze the rest of the food that I had bought. They stayed several days.

A few years later, I had made the mistake of inviting MIL and FIL over for lunch when DH's birthday happened to fall on a Saturday. I was very specific it was lunch and not a weekend. They complied with that part. She tried to trump me by bringing "the cake." I had already told her when I invited her that I had special ordered a theme cake that DH would like. DH called her that morning that she was coming. When he got off the phone, he said "you don't need to get a cake when you go to the store, M is bringing the cake." The cake was a surprise ordered from a friend who had a business making cakes. She dropped in and delivered the day before and it was well-hidden. I did not tell DH that MIL knew about the other cake. At the party, DH, trying to keep me from looking bad to mommy said "friend made me a cake too....", no mention of me. MIL's cake was a Bundt cake mix cooked in the microwave. Then she had the nerve to bring leftover of the friend's cake home and left the nasty one at our house!

After that year, the ILs started inviting themselves over for lunch the closest Saturday to DH's birthday every year. One year, they had SIL with them. MIL and SIL walked around the house looking at every knick-knack and everything picking it up examining it like they were on a shopping spree. I felt violated that time.

After that, I felt like I had to essentially "child-proof" when they were coming to visit. The next birthday, I put a lot of stuff on the bed in the spare room and locked the door. MIL opened the door with her fingernail I guess. I tried to laugh it off, saying "you're not supposed to be in here, this room hasn't been cleaned." She replied "That's OK, I just wanted to see what you have."

The following birthday, I put everything on the bed again, put a blanket over it and put a box in the room that was in the way of entering the room more than a couple feet -- (because there is a closet next to the door, it's almost like that room has a door-length, closet depth entry way into it. The box was just beyond that. That finally kept her out.

Two years after I cut MIL out of my life, and a year after FIL died, DH said that MIL and SIL wanted to come up on the weekend closest birthday. I told him that it was his birthday, his choice, but I wasn't going to be there. He frowned and said "Why can't they come visit?" I said "They can come visit. I won't be here." I did make plans for a place to be and places to hide the breakables and valuables -- this time under lock and key -- if they came over. But they did not. A visit from them was never mentioned again.

Best I can remember, there were no gifts brought to DH at any of those visits, other than the dry microwaved bundt cake. Oh, we were told we could keep the cake plate. I donated it to some group that was having a yard sale.

The Beginning

Most of the posts here will not be chronological. Many will be of the topics listed in the ideas section. Others will be stuff that I have shared over and over with the MIL support group I was involved in for the last ten or so years.

Hubbie's parents were both high school dropouts. FIL worked doing deliveries until he decided that he wanted to "own" his own store, so he ran a little store for a while.

Hubbie said that they didn't even have indoor plumbing for most of his childhood.

A person who knew Hubbie's family when Hubbie was young said that hubbie was there running the store on his own since he was "just a little thing."

When hubbie was finishing high school, he got recruited into the Air Force to learn Avionics. His parents did not like that. His father even said to him "Why do you want to do that when you can stay here and work at the store.

He went on to the Air Force. But he didn't get to stay long. Before his first term was up, the store was close to "going under". His Dad "wrote" a hardship letter to Hubbie's CO to get him an early release. (The letter was in a woman's handwriting, I have seen it.)

So hubbie left the Air Force and returned "home" to help with the store. He completed his obligation with some reserve duty. After his enlistment was over, he used his GI bill funds to get a technical school degree. (What's now community college). He was not able to find a good job in his home town so he once again moved away. To the city where we both now live which is about three hours away.

Less than six months later, the business went under again.

This time, hubbie went back and took out a consumer loan (high interest, Carter/Reagan error) to pay their way out of debt. As collateral for the loan, his father "sold" him the piece of property he had bought to put a second store on.

At this point, we are up to almost where I came into the picture.

His parents never worked after selling off the store and getting money from hubbie to pay the rest of their debts. His father actually said "I don't see why I should have to work if I can't work for myself as long as I have a rich son."

His son may have been rich by FIL's standards. He was a high school dropout in a family of high school dropouts living in a poor part of the state. But hubbie had a two year degree and moved to one of the areas where there are more PhD's per capita than most of the rest of the country. So he was pretty much average, or maybe a little below here.

Hubbie bought a mobile home to live in. Not a nice one, either. The smallest single wide they make. Cheapest appliances --fridge didn't even have a freezer, just a little ice compartment. Tub but no shower. No AC, no place for washer/dryer. 1 tiny bathroom and 2 tiny bedrooms. He had his clothes on metal shelves. He didn't have a car that would run, either. He got transferred to a job doing service work so he had a company vehicle and he used that for personal travel, too. He did not even have a TV in his trailer (not that it matters about the TV, but the car, AC, washer/dryer are a big deal.) No, he was not rich, but he was making enough money to be living better than that.

He gave his Mom signing privileges on his checkbook. He was paying a lot of their monthly bills. His Mom regularly called with needs and he would say "OK, two hundred dollars", which he meant for her to transfer to her part of the balance in his checking account. We are talking 1986 here, so that would be a lot more money in today's economy!

These demands continued the first five years of our marriage, and were pretty much the only point of contention (other than some housekeeping stuff) between us.

When we got engaged, FIL did tell hubbie "I am going to get a job so that you can have babies." He died 19 years later and that job never came about.

Things That I will Post here

This post is copied from my other blog, freeofJB.blogspot.com.

I wanted to leave that one to have stuff on it about how I am dealing with the death and loss of JB. I created this one so I can talk about the past instead of the present and issues related to JB's moving on to (yet) another dimension
I started this because I wanted to get all out. The following are some subjects that I will touch on.

• Going out to eat (in public - gasp!)
  
• Them visiting my home
• Disrespect of plans that we already had
  
• Condition of their kitchen
• Setups
• Medical Crying Wolf
• Her total envy of me
  
• Seven deadly sins
• Mis-Treatment of niece-in-law (she obviously hates both women who married into the family)
  
• Their blatant and unashamed racism - they are proud to be racist
  
• Them attending a KKK meeting
• Using racial slurs against their own biracial great grandchildren (and they got the race wrong on top of it)
  
• "Robbing" my Hubbie to pay my SIL
• Lifestyles after I lost my job in the 1990s - theirs and ours
  
• A couple positives
• Family reunions
• Late night phone calls
• What it was like attending the funeral
• What it was like when she was sick
• JB flipping me the bird
• JB making sideways comments about other people which were really comments about me.

Just Getting Started

I have the other blog, free of JB to discuss what I am going through having to do with JB's death. I am adding this one to put in some things about things that happened, things that I had to deal with while she was living. I'll get started later.